Pathetic people on online communities

Why can't people contact people without thinking...

a) sex
b) commercial
c) on themselves

On an online community why can't someone take contact simply cause they want to get to know you, cause they think you seem nice, or cause you share the same interests. Why can't people contact people to make new friends?

On Nettby, an online community in Norway I scoop through my mailbox. And one of twenty is a friendly person who's simply interested in who I am, and interested in making friends. One of twenty! The most of the others is there for sex and pervyness obviously. Every single mail is sent by a backthought.

Today this guy who could seem cosy contacted me, as I read the first sentence that is. Then he starts talking about himself, what he does, and that I should check out his work. So pure commercial, and just commercial.

"Hi, nice music taste. Check out my pictures, I am a photographer, I would advice you to check out these and these first, they are my best ones. Byyeee".

However I must admit that I prefer commercial over pervydudes lookin' for some pantydancing. And there's also these that makes me laugh by sending a message to me, allthough it stands on my profile that I'm taken, and not interested in getting to know people for those reasons.

"Hi, are you interested in a serious relationship?".

Sure, lets jump right in it! These ones are clearly desperate (and even more clearly saying that just to get some good stuff). They ask me, out from one picture on my profile, if I want a serious relationship. Firstly.. For all they know I'm a rapist, or I eat babies. Or I like it when someone pee on me. I might have a killer grandma who calls me with threats every single night, and I might also have a penis. Hell, I might be lesbian. But na, sure, you wouldn't mind, right? Let's get in a serious relationship. Now.

.. oh, wait, I wrote a firstly, guess there should be a secondly aswell.. Secondly: How desperate are you?

Quote-wise this is a hit aswell:

"You are so beautiful, I like you very much"

Read comments about previous quote (babyeater, grandmakiller, those things). And desperation. And.. Yes, I'm stating the obvious. Next!


There's also this third type of people that contacts you. The type that just without any common interests, any common.. anything really, writes you a couple of mails asking how you are and what you're doing. And then adding you as a friend, and never ever ever ever speaking with you again. Of course they seem like popular dudes or dudettes when they have 200 "friends" plusplus on an online community that they don't even know a bit. Get a life!

I went AWWWW

These kindof babies drags out the babylover in the darkest, most brutal metalheads. I'm sure.


(action from 2.00 and out)

Omg, aww!

Who said babies weren't metal? :P

Metalhead justifying listening to Lady GaGa

Lately I've been feeling this very embarrasing need to listen to Lady GaGa. Since I have a rumour and a life, and an image, and some dignity this isn't really something I say out aloud. Until I found God, and got a reason to listen to this kinda music. Now I can of course lie and say that I just listen to these metalized versions. And then perhaps I do sit left with some dignity. Perhaps.











Dignity left? Pretty please?

If I promise to put on Mayhem laters and scream with the lyrics and headbang so hard that all the braincells that makes me listen to Lady GaGa dies?

You're an angel, really.

The Ugliest Dog in Norway

A competition has been running in VG, a Norwegian newspaper, where readers sends in pictures of dogs they find ugly, and the jury and readers decide which should get the glorious title of "The Ugliest Dog in Norway".

This dog won:

The one and ugly thing I can find in this whole situation, is to hold a contest like that. Mabye I should host a "Norways ugliest person" contest and see how popular that is. Or the "ugliest journalist in Norway", "ugliest soul in Norway?". "Ugliest newspaper", congrats to VG, must be such an honour.

Look in the eyes of the dog and tell me it's ugly, please do.

Now, a big applaud to the people with so tragic life that they host such a contest. AND a bigger one til the owners of the dogs that they themselves look at as so ugly that they should be given the title "the ugliest dog in Norway.". Now, if the owner of this dog really find it so repulsive I'll take it. I usually prefer dogs with hair, but doesn't really matter!

I'll be back later with my "ugliest person in Norway" competition. Actually I won't, see, I have a life.

Wrinkly Bohlen

Sometimes (understatement) I'm bored, and therefore I find it entertaining to check blogcounter to find out what people searched to get to my blog. Sometimes what I read is kinda entertaining, so I figured, what the hell, why not share it? Here ye` go!


* Dieter Bohlen wrinkles

I kinda don't know what you''re expecting to find. Maybe it's a fetish, and you want to see some lovely picture showing his wrinkles? I'm sorry mr. Dieter fan-whicheversexyouare, you can''t find it here.

* ass licking

The day I start a pornblog I promise you'll be the first one to know. Maybe I'll even be nice to the searcher above here, and find some really lovely Dieter shots. Just to make you happy. Sigh, what a joy it is to make people happy.

* ape foreldre (en: monkey parents)

This is just.. weird. Grab a banana.

* asslicking videos in Deutschland

Check answer for ass licking keyword. And by all means, the day I start a pornblog I'll do it in German.I'll find a Heinz and a Helga and every (perv) person out there will be happy. I'll be their little pervy sunshine.

* cold toesies

Now this one just put a smile on my face, and the smile got bigger when I go to google and the FIRST result to come when you google that, is my blog. What a true honour. Cold toesis and my blog, hand in hand (/toe in toe? Am I being silly. Ok, stopping).

* manties panties

I find this funny cause it rhymes. I know, so 10-year-old.

* dornenreich gay

At the moment you are living in danger. If I find you I'll kick you in the nuts so you won't be able to reproduce. Ever. And after that I'll really torture you. We're talkin 24 hours techno, the same song. Over, and over, and over, and over, and over. After that I'll see how gay you find Dornenreich.

Oh yes, and just cause I like making people happy:

I hope the mength of wrinkles is satisfying, and that you are not all too disappointed that he's wearing clothes. Without a personal meeting with Dieter this is about what I can do.

A very cosy friend request

As a myspace-user I get tons of friend requests every week, mostly spam crap from rappers and stuff (take one glance at my profile, and you understand that they are obviously just spammin, why would I add a "Mr cool yo mama is hot 100 cent dude" when I obviously listen to metal?). And I deny as good as 100% of them. Unless it is a really good band (happened) or someone I actually know. Hovewer, today one came that I didn't deny. Some grim black metal band sending this message along with the request:

NO STEREOTYPE. NO HUMAN MOTIONS. DEATH. COLDNESS. DESTRUCTION. DARKNESS. Join our alliance!

And it's not cause it appeals to me in any way - I listen to metal, but I'm not that into no emotion, death, whatever, it's not cosy. I only didn't deny this one.. cause it's so damn hilarious?! On a sad day I'll just log quickly on to myspace and watch the blackmetal faces next to this very cute message.. and my day will be good again. Sometimes they kinda really embarrass themselves. Ahwell, at least it's entertaining.

I'll give the band this though, their music was kinda good. And I am not dissing them, not really. Just sometimes the whole mask the blackmetalbands put on. It's... Well.. Stupid.


G'night now ^^ 

Christmas in Germany

Note: I am embarrassed over coming with this now. Really.

So, finally I got out of my lazyplace and got started on this. I've had the intention from before christmas somewhen, and lookie. We're soon in February! NEVERTHELESS. Here, check out how amazing christmas in Germany is. Of course I can just give you a small idea over how nice it really is. Warning: This will contain many pictures.

I'm gonna start with pictures from Weihnachtsmarkt (so the christmasmarket) in Leipzig. Enjoy!

This here is the biggest christmas-calendar in the world! :D

And this is a very small taste of all the temptations that meets you. 

I have never in my life felt the same temptation. If I had not gotten an apple, I am afraid I would go crazy and scream loud. I would have lied on the ground and bashed my hands and feet til the ground. Eventually I would die of not getting enough air. And my boyfriend would struggle the rest of his life with traumas. Luckily for everyone I got an apple.

There were stands with everything you can imagine, nutcrackers, christmasdecorations, homemade candles. The smell was like I died and came to heaven. There were stands with nothing but huge gingerbreadhearts with cute messages written inside. Like "I love you sooooo much", and "I fetch you a star from the heaven".

Here you go!

A small part of the Weihnachtsmarkt was a middleage market, it looked awesomely cool. You really got the feeling that you were in the middle age.

Next to booths with cute things, there were also kinda weird things. New toiletbrush for christmas, anyone?

Just to make sure that I post this, and don't leave it as draft for ever and ever I'm gonna make this part one of.. dunno. But I'll continue somewhen else in another part :)

Enjoy!


PS: I am very aware of the senile looking blogpost. Why the writing turns against me, and takes a shit all over my blog to make it look like crap, I do not know. I will try to do something with it. Somewhen. Mabye after dinner.. but maybe not.

Pretty darn stupid..

...iPhone-apps

I don't know how many times I came over some iPhone app that made me wanna hit my head in the wall, more than 10 times, for sure. Alot more than the apps I show here, I'll just write shortly about some apps that reeeaaaallly made me wanna hit my head in the wall. The more of them I write, the more the wall calls for my head, therefore I'll keep it few.. for now.

iDie

Wanna know when you probably will die? Then this is the application for you! Keep track on your probable deathday, wherever, whenever!

















Fart Piano

An application that plays you notes.. in fart-sounds. Congrats on making the worst applicaton in the world, whoever you are that made it.










I Am Rich

When you thought the previous application was the stupidest ever... here comes I Am Rich! THIS application costs 1000 dollars, and the only thing you get is a diamond on the screen to "remind you that you are rich enough to buy a 1000 dollar app". 8 people bought this before the iPhone-app-store removed it. Is there really a worse way of using money?... I think not.
















Sim Stapler

When writing about this I'm just gonna quote what the sellers (I think) wrote about it:

The first true office equipment simulator!

The first true office equipment simulator, SimStapler© brings all of the thrill and excitement of a “real” stapler right to the palm of your hand.

It has been said that it is humanity’s imagination that sets us apart from the beasts of the field. Now, your children can learn to be more human by imagining they are stapling two sheets of paper together, with SimStapler©

You get the idea, or? Senseless.

 That's it for now, if I write more I will hurt myself. Stay tuned for upcoming parts of "Pretty Darn Stupid!" :D

Hello world!

It's incredible how isolated you feel without internet. Now I've had three days without, and I guess the only reason I survived was through crappy internet on my phone, where I could chat abit on msn, and mostly just that. But it's not that easy to get around without internet. Firstly, when you're curious about weather, news and those thing, you can just remain curious, or make sure to reach the daily weather-and newsreports at a certain time on telly. Another thing is that when you wanna know bustimes, ferrytimes or things like it, you just.. can't. In my case I had to ask a friend to check it and then send me an sms with the times on. It worked, but iiisolateed!

A third thing is that internet clearly stands for a big percentage of my day. So when it was away it took some time for me to realize just that. Original plan: chatting with boyfriend. So I had to replace the plan with something else. After alot of thinking I thought I could catch up with some German series.. online. Plan in garbage. But I could always read abit about... ah, na, online, plan cancelled. When I finally found something to do, watch some series that was on my harddisc, I got kinda happy and plant my butt gooood in the sofa, and prepare to start season 1 of How I Met Your Mother. But no, something screwed up with the codec in media player, so I can't watch it, actually, I can't watch one single episode of one single series on my harddisc. And for watching that, I need another player. So yes, plan cancelled - and of course I couldn't go through with it before internet was back. But I got through it somehow, and I can happily announce that I'm still alive.

So now, I feel a great pleasure to say hello to the world once more - it feels like it's been forever.

Ich bin wieder!

Ja, genau. Hier bin ich. In Norwegen. Nimmer in Deutschland. And that's the German you get today, if I do more I'm sure to do some embarrasing mistake, and some German will visit this blog and die inside. And then die outside, and I end up being a killer. Enough about that.

The second trip to Berlin airport was sucessful, and I actually arrived. With my luck the latest days I wouldn`t have be surprised if I`d have booked a flight for the sixth of January 2011. So in fact, I was one year and one day to early, not just one day. It went fine, I should stop writing stupid nonsense now.

Christmas and newyear in Germany was fantastic, of course mostly because I got to spend it with my love. With him I could celebrate christmas and newyear anywhere. But the German christmastraditions, the lovely, lovely Weihnachtsmarkt - I can`t describe it with words somehow. I`ll give you pictures as soon as I bother. Maybe laters, maybe tomorrow, maybe.. who knows? I don`t.

Much of the christmas went to playing cards, playing UNO, playing Activity, and laughing my ass of when doing all these things. I also took lovely walks outside in the snow, and played funny games on pc. I had a great time, as simple as that. It's not the last year I celebrate christmas in Germany, that's for sure.

I promise pictures will come :)

I`ve never felt more stupid

Nor, annoyed.. And angry? Hm. Yes, maybe.

Today is the day I've been dreading for three weeks, leaving Germany. So of course yesterday was dedicated to.. crying and.. crying, and then some more of that. I pack, and today I wake up early to reach trains and get my ass to Berlin, so that I can fly back to Norway.

I take the tearful farewell with schatzi, and I`m off to 3,5 hours with train. Went fine, and I arrive in one piece at the airport. I go to the checkin, and put my papers on the counter. After the dude in the counter watched the papers and me sometimes, he said that it's the fifth of January today. I agreed, why should I argue on the date. "Yes?", I said. He pointed at my papers showing me something that made me feel kinda... well, yes, crap. My travel was the sixth. How can I do that wrong? How is it even possible? I called my boyfriend starting with exactly these words "this is so embarrasing". And it was. We decided that it's best if I go back, that would be another 3,5 hours of train. What else could I do, really? I jumped on the first train and went back to him. And here I am now, feeling so, so stupid. Wishing that I'd notice before! Imagine what pleasure, noticing yesterday that I have not one, but two more days here. Hmf. The pleasure wasn`t overwhelming on the airport.

At least I learnt a lesson. Doublecheck. Ten times. Minimum.

Just a tiny, tiny..

wish for a happy new year :)Or should we take the German version? Guten Rutsch? :P Or even "Gesundes neues jahr?". Healthy new year?:D Do I have bad humor, or does it really sound kinda funny? Maybe it´s lame, sorry, I´m tired.

I will come with some kinda 2009-whatevers, but I´m not actually swimming in time, so it will come.. sometime. Til then! Tudelidu!